Conspiracy Theories: Haunted Histories


Artwork by Elizabeth Alexander

With Halloween just around the corner and the entirety of the U.S. raving about the spookiness of the month of October, scary stories are exactly what the public wants this time of year. However, it can be hard to know where to start reading. We decided to take matters into our own hands and create a few stories ourselves, along with compiling a few together that we didn’t write. Want to know more about the ghosts that may or may not haunt EPHS? Look no further. Turn the lights off, grab some Halloween candy, and buckle in because things are about to get creepy!

EPHS Stories:

Disclaimer: The following stories are up to interpretation and not meant to be taken 100% at face value. 

The cat that died: In 1995 a cat died in a 3rd floor bathroom. At 1:11pm on school days the cat’s ghost runs across the halls searching for mice to eat. If you look very closely, you can see its ginger tail as it searches for its treats. 

The M&M ghost: There is a ghost in the South Commons that loves M&Ms. Make sure you don’t eat them during fourth lunch or else the ghost will haunt you in your dreams for 2 weeks looking for more of the candy.

The auditorium: Have you ever been in the auditorium alone at night? Don’t try it now! During the month of October there is said to be a band of ghosts who give plays for the living about how they each died. There is a twist, however: when they get to the death scene, they take a member of the audience and kill them instead. The unlucky person is then doomed to spend the rest of eternity giving plays and taking the souls of the living. Legend has it that one day a famous actor will come to the school and put an end to the madness. Until then don’t go into the auditorium alone at night. 

Ancient Burial Ground: The school was built on an ancient burial ground in 1981. Back when it was built, the construction workers found the bones of the dead. One of the workers tried to take the bones off the site to take to the police. The second he took a step off of the property he and his entire family were cursed. A week later they were found dead in Lake Minnetonka. No one knows exactly what happened, except that their bodies were marked with ancient symbols. The spirits buried there haunt the school and kill anyone who takes pieces of the earth that belong there. 

The Clay Monster: Once in the early two thousands there was a horrible accident involving an art teacher and a bin of hot clay. The teacher wasn’t paying attention and suddenly she fell face first into the bin. The students tried to help her, but it was too late. Her body melted and merged with the clay. The students stepped back as something strange happened. The clay-human monster chased down the students and absorbed them one by one. Now the monster runs down the art wing absorbing students who are late to art class. 

The locks on the bridge: If you’ve ever walked across the footbridge over Valley View Road, you may have noticed an abundance of padlocks chained to the sides. There’s actually a reason for that. The ghost of the first EPHS student ever to die appeared just outside the school. She entered and decided to have some fun haunting the students by stealing 3 padlocks off the lockers along with anything inside. She walked towards the bridge and attached the padlocks before throwing 3 textbooks she found in the lockers onto the road below. The books hit the windshield of a car and it spun off the road into Round Lake, killing the two people inside. The process repeated for the 2 new ghosts. Over the years, this trio of ghosts has expanded into a huge army that kills drivers and steals padlocks, each time in increments of 3.

The stairwell killer: If you value your life, avoid the stairwells at the sides of the school at all costs. As buses shuttled students home one Friday long ago, a teacher was walking down one set of stairs and noticed the windows seemed to be glowing. She could barely process this before something stabbed her in the back and shoved her down the stairs, killing her instantly. Her bloodied corpse was discovered the following Monday and was quickly disposed of. Over the years, five others have fallen in this way, and there is no way to stop the strange curse. Now, if you walk down those stairs during classes, you’ll hear her final scream before you fall to the same fate she did.

The elevator: The school elevator has been the scene of many paranormal sightings through the years, the strangest being one where a spirit stopped the elevator and destroyed the lights during 3rd lunch. Luckily, the two students inside escaped unharmed after a horrifying 45 minutes, but they’ve refused to talk about the incident ever since. Some have speculated this is a result of a curse the spirit put on them.


The Monkey’s Paw by W.W. Jacobs:

This story is about a couple named Mr. and Mrs. White and is a warning about being careful what you wish for. A friend of theirs who served in the army stops by one night. He gives Mr. and Mrs. White a mummified monkey’s paw. The paw enables the Whites to be granted three wishes. However, the paw has a terrible curse. When a wish is heard, the paw causes terrible outcomes to occur for the people as punishments for tampering with fate.

The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving:

An American classic, this story involves the ghost of a headless horseman and a young man named Ichabod Crane. Ichabod is hunted down by the ghost late at night while walking through the woods, never to be seen again.

Minnesota Urban Legends:

Hairy Man of Vergas Trails: This urban legend says that in the town of Vergas, MN there is an 8 foot tall hairy man who kills woodland creatures. Be careful when you walk the trails, as few people make it out to tell the tale. 

Dead Man’s Trail: This urban legend tells the story of a Native American woman who lost her baby in a Minnesotan river. The legend says that she wanders the trail by the river searching for her child. If you listen hard you can hear her crying for her child.

Wendigo: Wendigo is an urban legend based in northern Minnesota. It says that Wendigo is a 15 foot-tall, supernatural monster. It is said that he is so thin you cannot see him from the side, but if you look at him head-on he will feast on your flesh.